Test anxiety and guarded optimism

Tests stress me out...giving them, taking them, just the word!  One of the many joys of preschool includes no more ISTEP and that anxiety.  However, waiting for the results from your first blood pregnancy test brings a whole new meaning to test anxiety.
We were able to change our testing days to Friday & Sunday, that way Joe could be with  me when we got "the call."  I'd been relatively sane while staying home and modeling the life of the kitties....until Thursday.  I'm not sure if it was hormones, general anxiety, or just a moment of total crazy...it was a total meltdown.  The reality of our pregnancy test set in and exactly what it meant hit.  There was some ugly crying, but Kitty, Baby, and Dude don't mind.  After about a half hour of crying like a wild woman and telling God how scared I was, I finally returned to normal.  Nothing beats a good cry and a nap!
Friday morning was the day!  I woke up at 3, and slept on and off until 6 when I did my progesterone.  Thankfully, I woke up at 7 in time for us to throw on clothes and hit the road.  Bless Joe for driving, because I'm pretty sure I slept most of the way to Bopp's.  We were at Midwest for maybe 10 minutes tops.  Just enough time to check in and get blood drawn.  Then, we had to wait....
The plan was to keep busy in Indy rather than just come home and stare at the phone.  We ventured to Target (for a potty stop) and Trader Joe's parking lot.  (Plan was to stock up on wine at Trader Joe's if results were negative)  After sitting in the parking lot (nope, we didn't go in), Joe decided we might as well head home because sitting in the car wasn't doing us any good.
Grandma always said a watched pot never boils, and I can add that a watched phone never rings!  We were about two blocks from home when the phone rang.  I think I could have thrown up!  Dr. Bopp called and said, "Congratulations, you're pregnant."  The rest of the conversation is a bit of a blur, but I remember asking him if he was serious and he said we could have some sparkling cider.  My HCG level was 75, which was above the 50 we needed for a positive!  I knew we would test two days later and that the number needed to go up.  He said it needed to go up 66%, and I was quite proud that I did the math on my own to figure out we needed a 125.
Needless to say, we were pretty emotional after that phone call.  For seven years, we have been waiting and hoping to hear, "You're pregnant," and the moment finally came.  The afternoon was filled with tears of joy (not ugly ones!) and a lot of thankfulness.

"These are the Special Times"

Last night at church, I made sure to thank God for the miracle of Christmas and our little miracle in the making.  
Today was less anxiety and stress than Friday, but still a little because they say to proceed with guarded optimism until we have the ultrasound and see the heartbeat.
The nurse called today with our results, the level was 126.  Just the increase Bopp said we needed.  It freaked me out for a bit because Bopp wants to a 3rd beta on Tuesday to make sure the HCG is still rising.  Bless Joe's heart for always being the calm and sane one reminding me that the increase was exactly what we needed...time to be happy and not freak out!  
My plan was to go back to my munchkins and my peeps at preschool on Tuesday, but why I keep thinking I should make my own plans...I dunno!  I am so blessed that the girls I work with are so encouraging and supportive.  "Take the day, don't worry, we got this!"  I really miss my girls and my kiddos, but figure another day home taking it easy can't hurt.  I'm also really thankful that not only do they tell me not to worry about school, they encourage me and pray for us!
We have amazing family and friends that have been with us for the journey and continue to have our back Jack.  Please continue to pray that our little embryo(s) stay implanted and keep growing.  My hormone levels need to keep rising and I need to continue to remain sane and calm until returning to my munchkins on Wednesday...I hope!
As always, thanks for the love and prayers!  They've helped us get this far!
Love,
Sarah & Joe